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10 Things You Need to Stop Doing for a Happier Life

10 Things You Need to Stop Doing for a Happier Life

Don’t we all seem to be endlessly searching for happiness? Sometimes we blame circumstances or people for the things that make us feel otherwise, when in fact it all starts within ourselves. It all begins within our own minds.

If you feel like your search for happiness never ends, and all you wish for is to finally be happy, look deep inside yourself and examine whether you’re embracing any of the traits or thoughts mentioned below. If you are, start working to get rid of them so that you can welcome more happiness into your life.

1. Being jealous

If you are comparing yourself to others as a way to inspire yourself to work harder and become a better person, that’s a good thing. However, if you let other people’s success become a burning fire in your mind, you will feel unhappy.

Looking up to successful people can be a benchmark for success and an opportunity to learn, grow, and prosper. You can learn from their strategies and cultivate your strengths. But remind yourself not to feel envious. This does nothing but keep yourself dwelling on that envious feeling, which is only a waste of time, energy, and peace of mind.

2. Fearing change

Change is scary, because it’s not what you’re used to. It’s uncomfortable, and it doesn’t make you feel secure or certain. However, the unknown that comes with change can actually bring excitement and opportunities. Take a leap...

How to Design Clothes

How to Design Clothes

  1. 1

    Learn about drawing. You don’t need to be a master illustrator; a lot of designers use a funky personal style when they design. That said, you do need to be able to communicate your vision visually.[1] Take a drawing class, study some books, or just practice, practice, practice.[2]

    • The most important part of learning any new skill is just doing it a lot. Set aside 30 minutes every day to practice drawing.
    • A good book to reference is Mark Kistler’s You Can Draw in 30 Days.
  2. Image titled Design Clothes Step 2

    2

    Learn about sewing. Even if you don’t want to be the one to actually sew your designs, you need to know about sewing. Understanding the possibilities presented by your...

What Happened When I Stopped Pretending Everything Was Perfect

What Happened When I Stopped Pretending Everything Was Perfect

Growing up, my parents taught me that no one would handle my problems for me; it was on me to face them, and then fix them. If I had an issue with a teacher, a fight with a friend, an essay that I just couldn’t seem to get right, they were there to listen and offer suggestions, of course, but they were not going to storm the gates and take over; finding a solution was my job. And I’m grateful for that.

A strange byproduct of this focus on self-reliance, though, is the fact that my family — myself included, as it turns out — doesn’t really believe in medication. Tylenol for a headache, Lipitor for cholesterol, sure... but drugs for the mind? Nope. Maybe it’s a generational thing; maybe it’s pride; maybe it’s a reaction to the rampant overmedication going on in today’s society, but whatever it is, my family’s attitude towards psychiatric medications (and therapy in general) burrowed itself deeply into my head.

So deeply that despite the fact that I like to think that I’m a generally open-minded person — and think that if something hurts, you should look for ways to fix it — I grew up believing that (barring “serious” mental disorders like schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, a.k.a. things that happen to “other people”), you do not need pills to fix your head.

You should be stronger than that.

Or at least I should be.

The strangest part: I studied cognitive neuroscience — basically, the biology...

7 Empowering Thoughts to Tell Yourself Next Time You're Stressed

7 Empowering Thoughts to Tell Yourself Next Time You're Stressed

It’s only Tuesday, and you’re likely still drudging through the priorities and responsibilities Monday had to bring. But when it comes to to-do list, nothing is less empowering than getting down on yourself. Acting with fear, trepidation, and worry wastes valuable time not just in the workplace, but in your personal life. In fact, worry might be our biggest waste of time not only because it takes up space where we might be dreaming up solutions, it zaps our energy. So instead of filling your mind with diminishing messages of fear and doubt, replace those negative thoughts with more positive and constructive ones that will fuel on the path to success:

7 Empowering Thoughts To Tell Yourself When You’re Stressed:

“I trust myself to find the solution

You don’t have the solution right now, or at least you don’t have it in your hands, which is why you’re stressing. The truth is, you don’t have to have all the answers, you just have to be willing to go out and look for them. Trust yourself to find the solution, fix the...

10 Things You Need to Stop Doing for a Happier Life

10 Things You Need to Stop Doing for a Happier Life

Don’t we all seem to be endlessly searching for happiness? Sometimes we blame circumstances or people for the things that make us feel otherwise, when in fact it all starts within ourselves. It all begins within our own minds.

If you feel like your search for happiness never ends, and all you wish for is to finally be happy, look deep inside yourself and examine whether you’re embracing any of the traits or thoughts mentioned below. If you are, start working to get rid of them so that you can welcome more happiness into your life.

1. Being jealous

If you are comparing yourself to others as a way to inspire yourself to work harder and become a better person, that’s a good thing. However, if you let other people’s success become a burning fire in your mind, you will feel unhappy.

Looking up to successful people can be a benchmark for success and an opportunity to learn, grow, and prosper. You can learn from their strategies and cultivate your strengths. But remind yourself not to feel envious. This does nothing but keep yourself dwelling on that envious feeling, which is only a waste of time, energy, and peace of mind.

2. Fearing change

Change is scary, because it’s not what you’re used to. It’s uncomfortable, and it doesn’t make you feel secure or certain. However, the unknown that comes with change can actually bring excitement and opportunities. Take a leap...

Tips to Keep Your Voice Healthy

Tips to Keep Your Voice Healthy

What does it take to keep your voice healthy for auditions, performances, and everything else you do? In recognition of World Voice Day, Dr. Wendy LeBorgne, voice pathologist and singing voice specialist, shares her top five tips to help you be at your best vocally.

1.  Train your voice and body just like an athlete: Learn proper singing technique, don’t overuse the voice, get plenty of rest, eat a balanced, healthy diet.  Singers are like vocal gymnasts who traverse their artistic range with apparent ease and flexibility. Gymnasts are extremely disciplined people who spend hours perfecting their craft and are much more likely than the general public to sustain an injury.  Professional singers carry some of these same risks and must maintain a disciplined practice schedule with intervals of rest and recovery to perform at an optimal level, regardless of genre.

2.  Let your voice shine.  Attempting to imitate someone else’s voice or singing style can require you to sing or do things outside of your comfortable physiologic range or current vocal skill level.  This could result in vocal injury.  Also remember that if you are imitating someone who is already famous, their millions have been made.  You want to be the next star that they hire, not just a copycat.

3.  Pace yourself.  When you are preparing for a show or audition season, you...

7 Reasons Why Quitting Is Sometimes Your Best Move

7 Reasons Why Quitting Is Sometimes Your Best Move

Winners never quit and quitters never win. So the saying goes. Inspiration hits via motivational quotes remind us quitting is not an option. The difference between winning and losing is never quitting. Losers quit when they’re tired, winners quit when they’ve won. And on it goes, down the slippery slope of disappointment and failure. Clearly, quitting is the not your best move. Except sometimes, when it is.

It’s helpful for quitting to have context. A tweet or quote doesn’t do it justice. There’s more to quitting than bowing out when things get tough right? You know when it’s time to consider quitting, when things no longer feel right. When you keep trying and that niggly feeling won’t go away. It’s not about effort. It’s about awareness.

My memorable ‘quits’ include quitting my corporate career and later, quitting a guest lecturing post, before I even started. When I quit, I didn’t feel euphoric or heroic. I felt I disappointed people, including myself. Looking back now, I see things differently. There are times when quitting is sometimes your best move. Here are seven reasons why.

1. It saves a lot of unnecessary pain.

If you persevere with that soul-sucking office job, or that college course that someone else chose for you, it’s prolonging the pain. You know it won’t end well so why put yourself through it.

2. It creates space for the right fit.

Ending...

What Men Really Want in a Woman

What Men Really Want in a Woman

My last article about What Women Really Want in a Man, quickly climbed its way to the top of my most popular posts. It’s exciting to see the response to this article, because it’s proof that there are men out there who are really striving to be the best they can be, and women who are holding out for them.

But  because relationships are’t one-sided, they’re not the best they can be unless both parties are striving toward health, holiness, and healing in their lives.  I think sometimes it’s easy for women to see the deficits and needs in the men around them, while never fully acknowledging the need for growth in their own lives.

What it comes down to is this: just like women are not satisfied in defining a real man by his muscle mass and sex drive, real men are shifting their perception of what they are looking for in a woman.  I see a new generation of men rising up, who in their maturity and discernment understand that boobs, bikinis, and sex appeal have little to do in the equation of a healthy and meaningful marriage.

Here are the qualities...

5 Strategies To Find The Work You Were Born To Do

5 Strategies To Find The Work You Were Born To Do

This article first appeared on QuietRev.com

On Tuesday, April 5, Susan Cain chatted with Chris Guillebeau, author of Born for This: How to Find the Work You Were Meant to Do. Chris’s philosophy is simple in expression and vast in implication:

  • You don’t have to live your life the way other people expect you to.
  • You can do good things for yourself and help other people at the same time.
  • If you don’t decide for yourself what you want to get out of life, someone else will end up deciding for you.
  • There is usually more than one way to accomplish something.

Below are a few highlights from Susan and Chris’s discussion about how to win the “career lottery” and find the work you were born to do.

What do you...

14 Things Ridiculously Successful People Do Every Day

14 Things Ridiculously Successful People Do Every Day

Having close access to ultra-successful people can yield some pretty incredible information about who they really are, what makes them tick, and, most importantly, what makes them so successful and productive.

“Whenever you see a successful person, you only see the public glories, never the private sacrifices to reach them.” - Vaibhav Shah

Kevin Kruse is one such person. He recently interviewed over 200 ultra-successful people, including 7 billionaires, 13 Olympians, and a host of accomplished entrepreneurs. One of his most revealing sources of information came from their answers to a simple open-ended question:

“What is your number one secret to productivity?”

In recording their responses, Kruse came across some fascinating suggestions. What follows are some of my favorites.

They focus on minutes, not hours. Most people default to hour and half-hour blocks on their calendar; highly successful people know that there are 1,440 minutes in every day and that there is nothing more valuable than time. Money can be lost and made again, but time spent can never be reclaimed. As legendary Olympic gymnast Shannon Miller told Kevin, “To this day, I keep a schedule that is almost minute by minute.” You must master your minutes to master your life.

They...